Last week I went 2–4, and the pros are not the alibi. The pros were 2–1. Indianapolis won the game. Denver won the game. Tampa's moneyline lost, 23–16. Campus was a zero.
Florida won 52–28. I had Ole Miss and the points. LSU won 35–6. Mike the Tiger ate the Aggies and I had taken him off the card to lay 4.5 with Texas, who won by three and did not cover. Iowa State had the points and still lost by fourteen. Leave the Gators, leave the Tiger, leave the Cyclones where they died, and campus is 2–1. The weekend is 4–2. I printed 2–4. That is not a bad beat. That is a bad edit.
So Ames is off, and so are the Giants. I am still a home dog. I am not laying with a team that just got punched in its own stadium.
Last week
Pro: 2-1 · College: 0-3 · Overall: 2-4
Season to date: 13-10-1
Saturday — campus
A home dog, a short road favorite, and a touchdown in Fort Worth. No Cyclones. They had their Saturday.
| Matchup | Spread Shenanigans | Hoagie Howl |
|---|---|---|
| Virginia @ Florida State (UVA −2.5) |
Florida State +2.5 | Virginia is 3–1 and a short road favorite. I know what this is. Home dog, small number, the heel. I am taking the Seminoles and the points anyway. If they lose by a field goal I will not call it a moral victory. I will call it the same mistake with a different logo. |
| Louisville @ NC State (LOU −3.5) |
Louisville −3.5 | They lost to Wake by three. I am not holding a funeral for that. Short number, on the road, bounce-back. I am laying it with the Cardinals. If the Wolfpack hangs around I had the right team and the wrong afternoon. |
| BYU @ TCU (BYU −6) |
TCU +6 | Number ten in the country, Saturday night, Fort Worth, and I am getting a touchdown. TCU is 2–2. I am not picking them to win the league. I am picking them not to lose by seven. If the book is six and a half I will take that too and I will not send a thank-you note. |
Sunday — NFL
Two home dogs and one short favorite. The Giants can watch. I am done dating a 12–7 win.
| Matchup | Spread Shenanigans | Hoagie Howl |
|---|---|---|
| Patriots @ Bills (BUF −6.5) |
New England +6.5 | Buffalo is 3–0. I am not laying six and a half in Orchard Park. The man at the other end of the bar will. Give me the Pats and the points. If the number walks to seven I still want it. |
| Rams @ Eagles (LAR −3.5) |
Philadelphia +3.5 | The number moved. They were a point and a half. Now they want a field goal on the road in Philadelphia after that Monday night. I will take the home dog. If I only kept one, this is the one. |
| Jaguars @ Bengals (CIN −2.5) |
Cincinnati −2.5 | Both of them are 2–1. Home favorite, short number. I am laying two and a half. Ben is laying it too. If we are on the same side, one of us had a stroke. I am still taking the Bengals. |
Six plays. One of them I share with the villain. Florida and the Tiger can laugh. I already did. If I stink, I stink. Hoagie out.
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